your room smells of hookers.
And success
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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