you win again, gameday.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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