So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Randomize
