i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
