I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
