brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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