now i know why i became what i already was.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
