i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
