dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
