i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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