just come out here and I will go home with you...
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Randomize
