don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Damn victory sex feels great
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
