The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
her vagine was all disorganized.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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