thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
i believe in u and ur pee
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
