I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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