I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
