So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
