Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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