Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Barsexuality is the new black.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
The air taste purple.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize