Don't you send me to vm
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
We talked him into tasing himself.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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