Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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