dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
