dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize