Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
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Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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