We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
only you would photoshop your dick
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize