covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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