Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
