in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
