I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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