Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
