You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
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You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize