i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
