How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
