It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Drunk is not a location!
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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