oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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