He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize