I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
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