when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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