I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I have already put on my inside pants.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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