apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Randomize
