you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
