you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Randomize
