In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
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