I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
