The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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