Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize