I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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