took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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