My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
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