don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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