So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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